day 2 following root canal and day 14 post plate removal

Today is day two following my root canal on day 12 of my plate removal surgery. My endodontist told me that my tooth was totally dead, and probably contributed to why I couldn't feel any pain associated with it. It was abscessed, and I have to go back to her again in three weeks to have more medicine put into the root canal. I have no idea when I will be getting a crown, but my orthodontist suggested waiting until my orthodontic treatment is complete. 

Due to how many antibiotics I have been on lately, my endodontist wanted to wait to put me on any. I am supposed to call her today to let her know if my swelling has improved. If it hasn't drastically improved, I believe she is going to either put me on some or bring me back in sooner. I haven't noticed a huge difference this morning, but I'm going to wait to give it time to settle (fluid can build up overnight while lying down) and then I'm going to take a picture to do a true comparison to yesterday's picture. 

The root canal was not that bad. I requested laughing gas, and I must admit, despite the feeling of being "high" I still got nervous. They numbed me up very well though, and I didn't feel anything but pressure and vibrations. Oddly enough, the most unpleasant part of the whole root canal was at one point I had an overwhelming stench of bleach, which seemed to seap into every orifice on my face. I could have sworn I was swallowing it, but I had a oral guard on and couldn't swallow anything. That part was by far the worst. 

There hasn't been a whole lot of pain with this root canal. I have taken some of my leftover pain medication because it does hurt at times, but it feels like a walk in the park compared to what I have undergone to date. 

I truly hope that this is over with. Other than the rest of my treatment for the root canal, I don't want to have to have anything done ever again. This has been truly miserable, but will hopefully be worth it when I look back at this journey. 

an update on day 11

I saw my dentist today. He took an x-ray and I was placed in the exam room to wait. I prayed the x-ray would be normal, but to my dismay and frustration I have an abcess on tooth #18 that must be fixed. The longer I let it go, the more it will eat into the bone that was just operated on. SO, I will be undergoing yet my THIRD procedure tomorrow at 2:15 pm. While it is only a root canal, it is still another surgical procedure and one that I am not looking forward to.

From what the dentist told me, it is normal for the root of a tooth to react this way following all of the moving and shifting and moving again with all of the treatment I have had. The recovery will be very minor (I will return to work Thursday, ready or not) and the swelling should be minimal. He believes that the swelling I have now is a result of both my second jaw surgery and my abscessed tooth.

At this point I am rather frustrated. I'm not frustrated at anyone specifically, I am just frustrated at the course that my journey has taken me on. I still know that this will be worth it, and I am still holding onto that. My surgeon and orthodontist have both been wonderful and I couldn't have asked for a better team to help me through this- it just appears as if I will get to add a few more doctors to that team! :/

day 11 following 2nd jaw surgery

Today marks the 11th day following my 2nd jaw surgery. I am doing much better pain wise. I am able to eat what I want now, although I am still a little bit sore afterwards. I also still feel awkward chewing, and I am trying to relearn this task. My energy level has returned to normal (which was never great to begin with). 

Today I am going to see a dentist to have the root of my back molar checked out. On the x-ray that my oral surgeon performed, it looked as if the root could possibly be infected or decaying. I am opting to get it checked by a dentist now rather than to wait, because I want to have peace of mind that there's nothing wrong. If there is in fact something wrong, I can't do anything about it yet. I will have to wait until about 3-4 weeks post-op. However, I will at least know why if I begin swelling again.

As of today, I am still swollen. I take pictures of myself almost daily to monitor the swelling progress, and it does improve with each photo. The first week, however, swelling reduction happened much faster. It has drastically slowed now, and I am extremely fearful and paranoid it will plateau. I am not as self conscious as I was before, because the lump is hardly noticeable. But every time I look in the mirror, I still see it because I am looking for it, and this of course bothers me.

My oral surgeon said if I was still swollen by Friday to come see him. He also said even if I am just unsure of my progress to come see him. I fully intend to go by his office either Thursday or Friday. I don't really think that my swelling will have totally smoothed out by Friday, and I need to have some reassurance from him that it will eventually. 

I do believe that this part is the hardest. When progress begins to slow, things begin to look and feel bleak. I know my body is still healing, but I cannot help the frustration that I am feeling. I am more than extremely ready for this lump to disappear and never, EVER, come back. 

I will update after my appointment with my dentist. 

day 7 following 2nd surgery

Today marks one week since undergoing my second jaw surgery. I saw my oral surgeon yesterday, and it was a good appointment. I'm going to fashion this post a bit different. I'm going to put my questions and his answers. These answers are not word for word, and at some points are my interpretation. I asked him the following:

1. What did the lump I had consist of? What was I feeling? Answer: I was probably feeling the bone plate. The tissues surrounding it were swollen. 
2. How bad was the infection? Answer: There are stages of infection. Mine was in the beginning stage, where there is no puss, but just cellulitis. It was probably headed towards a raging infection.
3. Will the swelling return to normal, and will that side match the other when I am fully healed? Answer: Yes, the side that had issues will match the other side when the swelling subsides. If the swelling gets worse or doesn't go down all the way, it would be because of my tooth decaying (if it's in fact decaying).
4. Were you able to see the root of my tooth and check it out? Answer: You can't see the root because it is inside the bone. He doesn't know whether or not the tooth will need a root canal.
5. When should I see the dentist again? Answer: Because of how swollen and tender I am, I should wait about 3-4 weeks before going to a dentist unless I really want to.There's no harm in it. (I am going to go to a dentist, but not for a cleaning. I'm going to have them give me their opinion on my tooth so that I don't have to worry about it.)
6. When can I begin eating things like popcorn and steak? Answer: I can eat whatever I want now. I need to be careful not to get things caught up in my stitches though.
7. If you had to guess how long will it take for the left side to return to normal and match the other side? Answer: He can't give a definite timeline, but if he had to guess he said that it should be back to normal by 2 weeks post op.
8. When do I need to come back and see you? Answer: I only need to come back and see him if I am swelling again, or if I am still swollen by the end of next week. If I am unsure whether my swelling is normal, I should come back also.
9. What really caused all of the swelling in the first place? Answer: He doesn't know this for sure, but he thinks that it was the combination of the loose screw and plate as well as the beginnings of infection. The screw could have been loosened by a hit to the jaw (I have a two year old that wacked me a couple of times) or my body could have been naturally pushing it out. I am the first person he has had to take hardware out of as early as 9 weeks.

That is all of the questions I can remember asking him! Today I am still bruised and tender, but my swelling is improving rapidly. My feeling is continually getting better in my chin and lip, although there is still a great deal of numbness there. I believe when it is fully healed it will be pretty darn close to 100% if not perfect!

Comment please! :) 

the countdown has started over..day 3

Today is day 3 following my second jaw surgery. Tomorrow will mark 10 weeks following my first. I am recovering very slowly from this second surgery. As I may have mentioned before, pain is worse because there is no numbness. My swelling doesn't really seem to be improving. I will say, my lips are not chapped like last time because they didn't swell this time around. They are split however, from where I'm guessing the surgeon had to pull them to get to the back of my mouth. 

I had 23 screws and 4 plates. I believe the surgeon removed 7 screws and 2 plates. I still have 2 plates and 8 screws in my chin, and 2 plates and 7 screws on the right side. I'm getting all of this information from my x-ray. I felt the need to count hardware. :)

My orthodontist wanted me to put my rubber bands back in as soon as I was able, and so I attempted this last night. I'm not going to lie, I wanted to come up with excuses and take them out. For some reason, I'm afraid the clenching of my jaw will create another lump. I have no science or facts behind this, but I just came up with it in my head. I've been good though, and have worn them since last night. It's been about 14 hours now. :)

Tomorrow I return to work, and I will admit that I am not ready. Not only do I still rely heavily on my pain medicine around the clock (about every 3 hours), but my face is grotesquely swollen on one side and looks very strange. I'm going to be more embarrassed this time than last. I also know how exhausted I will be because of how I felt last time. It's too early. Please, if you are planning this surgery, rack up enough vacation/sick time to be out for AT LEAST 2 weeks. I can not stress this enough. I needed 2 weeks with the first surgery, and I can't help but wonder if I hadn't pushed myself so much perhaps my body could have more effectively fought off infection. With this second surgery, I need at least a week. I don't feel that I am in a position to take off that much time, but if I was I would. It also doesn't hurt to inform your boss that there's a chance you will have to undergo a second surgery. Even if the chance is slim, if they are prepared you reap the rewards because you can take off more time. 

I cannot even begin to explain how badly I want this all to be over with. This is just a bump in the road, but I am ready to wave goodbye to this chapter of my life. 

Please post comments, I still have 0! Feel free to share experiences or ask questions. That is what this blog is here for. :)

day 1 following my 2nd jaw surgery

So I underwent my second jaw surgery yesterday. I have to admit, this surgery was a good bit more painful than the first. I believe this is largely because there was no nerve damage, and so I could feel everything that I couldn't feel before.

My surgeon said that he didn't find much infection, but he did find a loose screw. He removed all of the plates and screws on my left side, but left the others in. We're not sure what was causing the severe swelling, although we are hopefully it will now go back down to normal. My orthodontist believes the swelling was due to the loose screw and the hardware on that side.

My face is so incredibly swollen right now, but only on one side. It looks grotesque. It feels softer than it was before though, so I am hopeful the lump is gone although it is hard to tell at this point.

I plan to take Monday off of work. My surgeon informed me that that would be the hardest day. I will probably go back Tuesday, although it's not going to be easy. It will also be embarassing because my face looks so strange right now.

The symptoms I'm experiencing are somewhat different this time. I have the same swelling that I had before, but I have more pain where the incisions are. He cut right through the old scar tissue, and now that I am not numb on the inside, I can feel it and it's very bothersome. I didn't experience any new numbness, and the residual numbness is continuing to improve. I can open my jaw wider than I could on the first day following my first surgery, although my mobility is much more limited than it was before surgery yesterday. I am restricted to a soft food diet for the first 48 hours, and then no meat or anything tough and crunchy for the first week. After that I can return to a normal diet. As you can probably imagine, I've taken quite a few steps back. I am hoping and praying that this time will be the final time. My biggest concern is my lump that I had. I want it to be gone for good, as I was very self conscious about it. Of course, not many people go into orthognathic surgery for purely cosmetic reasons, but it is a big perk and a huge plus. To face losing the cosmetic benefits because of a lump or abnormal swelling can be very discouraging. This second surgery has given me the opportunity to create more normalcy to my orthognathic recovery.

tomorrow is the day

Well, in about 18 hours I will be undergoing my second jaw surgery. I am much more anxious and nervous this time than I was the first time. I guess it is because I know what to expect going in. Last time, I didn't want to know and so I didn't ask many questions. Now, whether I asked questions or not, I know a lot of what I will feel like and endure when I wake up.

I have to go into work tomorrow until my surgery, and I just wish I could sleep through the rest of the day. I know that it's going to crawl and drag on. I truly hope the day passes quickly. I can't eat or drink anything past 3 am, and I will be up at 6:15 am. This is going to be really tough.

As of today, the feeling is returning in the second half of my chin! This is huge news, because I was beginning to think it wasn't coming back. But it's also bittersweet, because I fear that I will go numb again after tomorrow. I may not, but this is something I don't know the answer to. I'm scared that after al this time (almost 10 weeks), I will lose feeling and have to start the nerve healing process over again. I'm scared that it won't come back the second time around.

If I could only calm the nerves and the thoughts racing through my head, tonight and tomorrow would be easier. Unfortunately, I can't turn it off. This post is jumping all over the place just like my head.

I will post updates once I am feeling better or up to it. Post your comments please!

here goes nothing - a second jaw surgery

Well today I noticed that the swelling had begun to spread to my cheek. I am taking the antibiotics, but I called my oral surgeon to make sure that was normal for the swelling to increase. He decided to go ahead with the second surgery. So, in about 3 days, I am undergoing my second jaw surgery in the last 3 months. He is going to drain the infection and remove the hardware. He'll hopefully cut out any excess bone growth if there is any and smooth out the bump once and for all. 

I continue to second guess myself. I wanted to have the surgery now because I want to get it over with rather than to wait until May (which was my plan before the infection)...so I saw this as an opportunity to get it out of the way. A co-worker also noticed that the swelling was moving into my cheek, so I don't know why I continue to question whether I overreacted. If she can see it after only 24 hours, then surely I am not seeing things. 

He wants me to continue my antibiotics until surgery. I am guessing that he wants as much of the infection to go away as possible. I don't think he anticipates that the infection will improve 100%, and if it does, I think he expects it to return (as do I). 

I am totally concerned and terrified of relapse from removing hardware this early on. The surgeon says that it will make no difference because the bones are fused together (you can see it on the x-ray), but my personality is to worry constantly and so I am. I spoke with my orthodontist though, and he reassured me that I will be wearing my elastics for quite awhile as he originally planned, and they will help to keep everything in place if there is any residual healing to be done. I hope that there won't be any abnormal bone growth after the second surgery. I don't want to have a third, but I want my face to be even after all of this effort and pain. 

UGH...I truly wish I could stop stressing about this. I intend to ask all of my questions before the surgery so as to make me feel better. 

Feel free to share your experiences. :)

                                      Sunday                               Tuesday

               At first glance, it almost appears like my "lump" was larger on Sunday, although if you look close enough my cheek surrounding it is actually puffier today than it was a few days ago, hence the additional swelling. 

an update on complications

I saw my oral surgeon this morning, and the news that I received was not great. He performed an x-ray, and this lump is not extra bone. It's infection, and a bad one at that. He's concerned that my very back molar is decaying at the root, which could be one potential cause. He thinks the screws could possibly be causing infection as well. He put me on a strong antibiotic, but he isn't hopeful that it will work. He said that even if it does go away, it will probably come back. He's anticipating that I will have have another surgery soon. He's going to have to drain the infection and remove the screws. Have any of you had plates and screws removed this early in the process? He says that my bone is mostly fused together and removing the screws at this point will not impact my bite. However, I'm only 9 weeks post op. I don't want to relapse, because I never want to have to undergo anything like this again. Let me know what your experiences were and if any of you had them out this early. "Sigh" ... I expected to be over the hump at this point. I feel as if it's just beginning. 

approaching week 9...some new complications

I will be through my ninth week of orthognathic surgery recovery on Tuesday. My recovery has taken an unexpected turn. The past several days have been filled with worry and anxiety, as my jaw bone bump has begun to swell and grow. It is growing more tender and painful by the day. It is uncomfortable and somewhat painful to put on makeup and touch that side of my jaw. It is also painful to lay on that side.

I have yet to call my surgeons office because I assume there is nothing to be done over the holiday. I plan to go see him tomorrow. Even if he suggests it is normal and nothing to worry about, I'd still like to go in and have an x-ray. I fear that there will be something wrong and I will have to undergo another surgery. I will feel better knowing everything is still intact.

 This bump I have has made me increasingly self conscious. I cannot wait until it is gone...I fully intend to have the plates and skrewes removed from my jaw within the next few months.

Day 42 - a huge milestone!

Today is day 42 (or 6 weeks) post op for me! This is a huge milestone, as my orthognathic surgeon has released me into my orthodontists care. He has also given me permission to begin chewing again. Mind you, soft foods only for another week and a half, but it's a start!

I attempted to chew some pasta tonight, and I quickly discovered that I am going to have to retrain myself to do this simple task. Not only do I not know how to chew in my new bite position, but my muscles are sore now after eating one plate full of pasta.

It's only been six weeks, but I can't help but wish that my transformation was complete. My smile is a little bit odd and will need some training of it's own. I also have a "bone bump" on the left side of my face that may or may not smooth out over the next 6 months. If it doesn't, I plan to have my surgeon shave it down. I appear more swollen on that side and I don't like it. I am so ready to feel normal and pretty again! This will come in due time, but I am not a patient person by any means.

I am still numb on my left side. The feeling has returned in my right and it is split right down the middle. My surgeon has advised me that if the feeling is not back in 6 months to a year, it's not coming back. I would do the surgery over again even if I had known before I wouldn't regain feeling. The only real inconvenience with the numbness is the difficulty putting on chapstick and missing crumbs on my chin when eating.

I no longer have the elastics my oral surgeon equipped me with, although I do have some from my orthdontist. Strangely enough, from a comfort stance, I prefer to wear rubber bands. I feel odd without them in my mouth. The "good" news is I get to wear these for another 6 weeks or so.

As promised, I have another picture for you. I think there is quite a difference here than in my original picture. I HOPE there is.

 

 I promise I'm not as angry as I look in these pictures. But as you can see, there's a good bone bump on that right side. I HATE this and truly hope it will go away as soon as possible. UGH. Looking at these pictures is discouraging.

 

day 28..having some concerns

I am now on day 28 of my orthognathic recovery. I saw my oral surgeon yesterday. He wants me to continue to wear my rubber bands. They are not as tight as they were when I was totally shut. I can speak against them, although it can cause some pain. I am also able to take them out to eat. I can deal with the rubber bands because I'm able to speak and eat.

Half of my chin and lip have feeling, while the other half is still totally numb. I am beginning to get concerned that I will never regain sensation. I know that it is still extremely early in the recovery, but I just don't understand why only half of my chin has regained some feeling. I am assuming the nerve on my left side was damaged more than the right. I've tried to find information on the internet about this, but all I can find is that numbness can last anywhere from weeks to several months and a small amount of patients have some permanent loss of sensation.

I don't know if it is due to the numbness or swelling, but I have somewhat of a lisp when I talk. I also cannot smile right. I am guessing and hoping that these things begin to correct themselves.

I didn't have all of these questions before, because it was such an extreme surgery. I assumed everything that I felt and saw was normal. Now that I am starting to recover and feel a little more normal, the concerns are arising. 

I can't even begin to explain how ready I am for the recovery process to be over, but I am also just as excited for my orthodontic treatment to be over. I am ready to feel confident and beautiful again. I haven't felt that way in quite awhile, and I won't feel totally confident until my braces are off. I hope and pray I only have about six more months of braces. 

Some of my symptoms are beginning to resolve themselves. My face has all but quit peeling. The dryness seems to have resolved now. My "post surgery acne" is beginning to clear up. This helps to boost confidence.

I still have wrinkles around my mouth. I am becoming extremely concerned about this. If any of you have experienced this post orthognathic surgery, please share your experiences as I am terrified my skin will not bounce back. I don't want to do any injectables, but I will if these wrinkles don't go away. I'm 21 years old and refuse to live with my first wrinkles yet. Especially not around my mouth!

As you can see, some of the aesthetic concerns are beginning to show themselves. I am assuming that this is normal, now that it has been a month since my surgery. Most surgeries do not require nearly this much time to recover, hence why it feels so strange to still be suffering from symptoms after all this time.

Please share your experiences! I know I promised pictures at 1 month, but I am at work right now and unable to take anything. I will post soon!! 

day 22 ... crawling

Today is day 22 of my orthognathic journey. I saw my oral surgeon two days ago. I told him I felt my bite was off again, and indeed it was. He rubber banded me again, which is exactly what I feared. The good news? It's not nearly as tight. I can talk if I make an effort to open my mouth against the bands. I can also take them out to eat. The downside to taking them out, though, is putting them back in. They are complicated and very difficult to replace.

I still am very swollen. I'm also concerned because the creepy crawling feelings I was getting in my chin have now all but disappeared. Either that or I don't notice them anymore? As of now I have feeling in one patch of my chin and half of my lip. I know it's already been 3 weeks, but the horror stories of people never regaining feeling are starting to get to me. I guess I will ask my surgeon next time I see him about the numbness. It's the  very question I've been avoiding, so as not to stress myself out anymore.

I've also noticed that my skin has been very dry, flaky, and peeling. It's been localized around my jaw, lips, and chin. I think that it has something to do with the swelling, although I don't understand why it would cause peeling. So for those of you who are planning this surgery: buy lots of good moisturizers. 

I still have the wrinkles I noticed a couple of weeks ago. I have noticed however, that they improve when I am not rubber banded shut and also when I am hydrated. They are much more prominent when I am dehydrated and when I am rubber banded shut. Perhaps the clenching of my jaw makes them more pronounced?

I hate to say it, but I am still needing my pain medicine every now and then. I believe I wouldn't need it at all if it weren't for the rubber bands. If they aren't making my jaw hurt, they are making my teeth hurt from where they are putting so much pressure on the brackets. I also still need my muscle relaxer at night, but this is because I want my jaw to grow correctly while I am sleeping, and I tend to clench my jaw a lot especially with rubber bands. I don't want to clench in the wrong position. Am I paranoid?

I'm still hungry, although the cravings are significantly less. I have found more things that I am able to eat. I can eat hamburger helper if it is just rice. I just cut up the hamburger chunks extremely small, and I am able to swallow a forkful with no problem. I've also discovered that I can eat chocolate chip cookies. You may be thinking how that's possible, but the key is to take them out of the oven when they are extremely gooey. Give them no time to harden or cool off, and you can eat them with a fork without chewing. They are just mush, and absolutely delicious. And for those of you who are addicted to popcorn late at night (well you probably didn't eat it every single night like I did), I get my salt fix in bed by drinking chicken broth. My bowl of popcorn every single night has been replaced with a cup of chicken broth (two chicken cubes for extra flavor) every single night. Although I cannot wait for popcorn again, the saltiness of the chicken broth helps to curb the cravings.

When I reach 1 month of post orthognathic surgery, I will post pictures. Leave your comments please!

finally some relief - day 15

I saw my oral surgeon yesterday, and THANK GOD, he took off my rubber bands. It's such an amazing feeling to be able to open your mouth and talk normal after a week of not being able to do so. It's also an amazing feeling being able to eat things such as rice and mashed potatoes again, instead of the soup you've had for 7 days straight. I can only imagine what it will feel like to eat a steak or french fries.

I still have complaints though. I'm still hungry. I've lost 9 lbs so far and it's only been 2 weeks. My weight loss is, however, supposed to slow down. At this rate, I will probably be down by at least 20 lbs when this is over. That is, if my weight loss slows down as expected.

The only thing I dislike about my rubber bands being off is that I am constantly analyzing my bite. Over and over and over again. My jaw actually got sore last night from biting down so many times, trying to make sure that it was still in the right place. What is throwing me off is that my teeth still have a lot of movement to make, so they do not all touch in the back. This of course makes me feel as if my bite is off, when it's not my bite, but the position of my teeth.

I've noticed that the right side of my jaw (the side that is more swollen), is much more painful than the left. I wonder why that is? Perhaps he had to do more work to that side.

I also noticed that I can really feel my stitches now. They go all the way into my cheek and about halfway up towards my upper jaw. I didn't realize how big the incisions were. I'm also bothered by my braces bracket in the back for the first time. I think I've been incredibly numb this entire time, and now I  can finally feel it poking me. It hurts!! Unfortunately, I can't open my mouth wide enough for my orthodontist to fix it, so this is something I'll have to life with for a little while.

Everyone says that my swelling is down a great deal, although my surgeon still said I have a long way to go in that department. 

I can't wait until I can open my mouth wide enough to brush the back of my teeth. I would give anything to be able to do that again. I wonder if I can use mouthwash safely when I still have incisions that are healing?

Anyways, here is to hoping I can forget about my bite for awhile. I need to quit worrying...I can't wait until this awful recovery process is finally over.

getting somewhere - day 14

Today is day 14 of my orthognathic recovery. The past week has been relatively uneventful. Things are starting to progress much more slowly. 

My chin is still numb, although I have over half of the feeling back in my lip. I will say that sometimes the nerves are sensitive and its painful. I am very sensitive to hot and cold. I can also feel pressure on my chin, although my skin can't feel anything.

I'm still very swollen. I think I have what they call bone bumps. The swelling is very hard to the touch. It feels just like bone, which I've read is a normal part of healing. 

Besides the fact that I am still starving, my biggest complaint as of today is that at 21 years old, I have developed wrinkles around my mouth. This is largely due to the liquid diet; I constantly have to "pucker" to eat. I've also been told it's most likely because I am dehydrated, and that my skin should bounce back. Needless to say, I will be drinking lots more, and I am moisturizing much more rigorously now. I pray these wrinkles soon disappear. 

I've lost lots of weight, and my clothes are noticeably loose. The weight loss is supposed to slow down, but right now it's rapid. I fear I will be emaciated when this is over. I counted my calorie intake the other day. I had consumed 690 calories the entire day. No wonder I am loosing. It's difficult to take in enough calories when all I can have are liquids. I can't afford 3 Boosts a day.

My next appointment with my oral surgeon is today; he promises that my rubber bands will come out and I'll finally be able to talk again! Hopefully this will return some normalcy to my life. I don't want to get my hopes up, but I can't help it. Having my mouth banded shut has been very painful. I saw my surgeon in tears Friday, only to find out that I was having "muscle spasms" and I was given a muscle relaxer. I am much better now, but I can't wait to be able to eat mashed potatoes and cottage cheese again! I'm so sick of soup! 

feeling crappy - day 8

I'm on day 8 of my orthognathic recovery, and I'm really getting sick of being miserable. My jaw will be wired shut for more than likely the next week, and all of this is beginning to overwhelm and depress me. 

For those of you who have been pregnant, remember how you felt around 34-36 weeks? You couldn't quite see the end in site, you were totally unsure of how your body would look afterwards, nothing worked right, nothing fit, etc...? That is how I'm feeling right now. I'm sure I'll look great, but the anxiety of not knowing is getting to me. I know I'll be able to eat again, but 7 more weeks is a really long time. I'm hungry and there's nothing that will work to satisfy my cravings. I hope these feelings pass.

I'm sitting here at lunch at work, and I am just wanting to go home and rest on the couch. I'm tired, I feel like crap, and I'm having a nearly impossible time motivating myself. I should have taken off more time. I wish I could at least work from home...

I am still just as swollen today. I am not up for posting any pictures...I'm just feeling too self conscious. I wish I could hide my face for the next 2 months. 2 months right? 

Sorry that this post is pretty depressing...that's how I am feeling right now. I've been told that is part of the process, but it doesn't make it any easier. I'm holding onto how worth it everyone tells me that this will be...

here goes nothing...day 7

     I decided to begin a blog about my orthognathic jaw surgery. I thought perhaps it would benefit myself as well as anyone who happens to read it. I realize there are so many of these out there, but  maybe mine will be unique for someone. So here goes nothing...

     Before my jaw surgery I had a deep overbite that I had previously attempted to fix as a teenager with braces. Because braces alone failed to work and I relapsed, here I am as an adult with a new set of orthodontics and on my seventh day of my orthognathic jaw surgery.

     My surgery entailed of correcting my overbite with lower jaw movement alone, as well as manipulating my chin into a more cosmetically pleasing position.

     Day 1-5 were pretty typical. I spent day 1 in the hospital. I was extremely swollen. The biggest things that I noticed were that I was not in as much pain as I thought I would be (perhaps the morphine?) and that my biggest complaint was the swelling, numbness, and chapped lip. I'm not sure why my lip got so chapped, I just know that it had something to do with the swelling. I put chapstick on constantly and still today it is very chapped. Yesterday, day 6, I was very tired and worn out. I was trying to focus at work, but found myself checking out around 2 pm. Also, I could not move my neck far enough back to wash my hair, nor could I lean forward enough in the sink to wash my face. This is much better today, and was the worst yesterday.

     The symptoms I am experiencing today are frequent tingling and continued numbness in my chin and lip. However, I've noticed that today for the first time there is one tiny patch of feeling that has returned on my chin. That is something to celebrate! I've also had this awful sensation that something is stuck in my throat, ALL DAY. I do not know if this is related or not, but it sure has been a pain. 

  I had my first follow up appointment with my oral surgeon today. Much to my dismay and disappointment, he decided that my bite was at risk for shifting either to the right or left, and so he banded my mouth shut. I trust him, and so I let him do it. That doesn't mean that it isn't miserable though! I can't talk to coworkers or family members very well at all.

     If I had to pick one thing that stinks the most about this whole ordeal other than the cosmetic appearance that is just embarassing, I'd pick the hunger. I have been craving my favorite foods, favorite restaurants, and anything salty that I can get my hands on. I have begun making plans and lists for the things I will eat when my 8 weeks are up. I have mastered the art of swallowing whole spaghettios, rice, and scrambled eggs in a desperate and always failed attempt to satisfy my cravings. I am not allowed to chew, but who said that I couldn't swallow? ;)

      Now that I am wired shut, I have to liquify everything and eat through a syringe. I just attempted to eat puree'd soup with a syringe for the first time tonight, now that I can no longer enjoy what I now consider a luxury. It truly was disgusting. Not only was it nearly impossible to get the food into the syringe, but when I was done I had so many tiny bits and pieces in my braces. I rinsed my mouth about 10 times to get it all out. It's hard to rinse when you can't spit!! I think I've decided I am going to stick with milkshakes (halfway melted) and chicken broth. At least the weight loss will be expected!    

My biggest advice to anyone that is planning the surgery are the following things:

1) Plan more than 1 week off from work. You are going to be exhausted from recovering and won't have the energy to put into work that you need to

2) Buy lots of straws, dietary supplemental drinks, chicken broth, and lots and lots of soups

3) Set aside some money for many unexpected runs to the grocery store, local fast food joint for milkshakes, and pharmacy

4) DON'T EXPECT to look amazing one week after surgery. I didn't think I would still look this WEIRD, and it's been somewhat of a hurdle trying to get me down today. Expect to look strange for a long time...I'm hoping it's going to be worth it. :) Please share your experiences and post your comments. I will try to update often!

     Even though I didn't want to, here are my photos from today. Ignore the giant pimple on my head. It's very difficult to wash your face after jaw surgery. :) You'll notice one side is much more swollen than the other, which is normal from what the surgeon told me. My jaw looks like it is clenched though...I am hoping that is just an effect of being banded shut.